Friday, May 16, 2008

Would You Go Ahead and Die Already?

I know it's kind of a morbid title for a blog entry, but it seems to be a reoccurring thought going through my mind as I struggle against my sinful nature in my desire to bring all things captive unto Christ. I hate my sin. I see how it inhibits the spirit's work in my life. I see how it harms my friends and neighbors. When the Bible speaks of our new life in Christ, it does so in a harsh, definitive, and permanent way: death. But the good news is that it is through this dying that Christ gives us new life- we are truly transformed, and something different.

Galatians 2:20 "I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave himself for me."

Galatians 5:24 "Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires."

Colossians 3:3 "for you have died and your life is now hidden with Christ in God."

It is truly in death that we have new life- free from worry, fear, sin, greed, lust, selfishness, and the like. The reason we feel so "dirty" in them, is that we were created in His image- and we weren't meant for them. So every time my sin pops up- I find myself up in arms! "I thought you were dead! What are you doing here?"

Example: Wednesday was what I would call a "bad" day. I was tired from staying up late the night before praying having just worked a really long day. I felt really annoyed. Then, all of my adult students were really late to class, and then stayed a half hour into my lesson planning time before my next class. I kept nodding almost nodding off during a private lesson, and they my upper elementary class was out of control wild. Normally, my first tactic in classroom management is to simply redirect the behavior into something else and to not respond to the bad behavior. I ended up being a strict teacher that day, which I don't like. At the end, around 6 PM, my day turned around 180 degrees; I realized how incredibly self-focused I'd been all day; how any bad day I may ever have is more often than not linked to my attitude and approach to things rather than external factors. On whatever level, conscious or unconscious, I was choosing to have a bad day by choosing a bad attitude. So I repented, and everything changed. Amazing how that works! Then follows Joy! It is impossible to have joy when focusing on yourself first. It really puts every bad day I've ever had in perspective!

This realization was further demonstrated to me yesterday during a devotion time following a class at the English school. the topic for the month is Joy, so I began the devotion by asking the students to reflect upon something that gives them joy; or a time when they've felt joy. One student said when she accomplishes something; another said when she is with her family. But one student said she felt joy when she served other people. And it didn't strike me until this morning when I was walking to church, but that woman's statement is an incredible witness to God's love for us and the truth that we have been created in His image. Christ too found joy in serving; and it is this joy that led Him to the cross. "who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising its shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." (Heb. 12:2) When we lose ourselves, when we die to ourselves in serving the interests of others; we are acting as we were made to- as we were created to. And in this is joy!

It is my prayer for myself and for all of you that "He would increase, and we would decrease." That we would define the joy in our lives less and less by our external circumstances and more and more by God's disposition towards us- who in Christ has forgiven us, called us His own, and has given us eternal life in Him (new life that begins now!). So when you feel the world caving in around you, think on this, and trust in His love and provision for you, and His Joy will be yours!

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